How 'I'm Sorry' is Losing You Sales
4 Minute Read
Language is important.
I’m always talking about positive and negative associations, and encouraging my attendees in training to become more thoughtful and purposeful about the language they use on a day to day basis. Unfortunately, it’s easy for certain words and phrases to become habitual, to the point where we don’t even realise we’re using them. This means a regular review of our selling style and rhetoric is beneficial for even the most veteran salespeople (sometimes especially the most veteran salespeople).
Everyone sells differently, so of course I am not asserting that we should all be sticking to a specific cookie cutter mould of words and phrases in our interactions. That would not only be ineffective, but also probably pretty inauthentic. I am, however, advocating for a more thoughtful and conscious use of language, so that the words you say send the message that you mean as effectively as possible.
There’s one big phrase we’re going to focus on today. And that is:
“I’m sorry.”
It’s actually said with good intentions most of the time – where the salesperson is trying to make the client feel more comfortable, to relate with them and maintain rapport. Maybe they’re trying to show empathy and compassion around the concern or request of the client.
However.
The message of ‘I’m sorry’ is often akin to an admission of fault, a feeling of sadness or disappointment, a feeling of guilt or regret. Yes, now I’m simply giving you definitions. But when we relate this to the most common times ‘I’m sorry’ tends to pop up in a sales interaction, we can see how this can get pretty negative pretty quickly:
1. ‘I’m sorry’ in the introduction to a phone call.
Think, ‘sorry to bother you’, ‘sorry for calling you at X time’, ‘sorry if I’m interrupting’.
What is the big message being sent by this? When you are literally apologising for contacting someone, the inference is that you are not providing them any value. That you’re about to waste their time. It’s anticipating that the person has better things to do, which implies that your phone call is not an ideal thing to do.
The reality is, if you are selling a product that will provide value for your client; save them money, increase their productivity, add to their lifestyle or business – then you should not be apologising for interacting with them. You should, instead, confidently approach the call with the knowledge that the call is anything but a waste of time.
2. ‘I’m sorry’ when your product doesn’t do what the client wants it to do.
We’ve all had this before. A client who wants your product to have a certain feature or functionality that simply isn’t there. Now, sometimes this feature is a big enough deal to the client that it turns out you’re looking at the wrong product for them. More common, though, is that the feature is simply a ‘nice to have’ – sometimes we’re even asked for features that no one on the market provides!
No product does everything. Every product has its features and benefits, and there is nothing in any market anywhere that doesn’t have its limitations. Understand that this is often not a big deal unless you make it one. Do not apologise for something your product does not do. Back your product and focus on what it does provide instead.
3. ‘I’m sorry’ when you aren’t going to give any more concessions in a negotiation.
We hear it all the time. ‘Sorry, that’s the best I can do.’
Why are you sorry about your price? You shouldn’t be! This can send the message that you believe it should be cheaper, or come with another freebie. If your product is worth the value, then you shouldn’t apologise for it. Period.
A quick disclaimer: I should point out that there are, of course, occasions when apologising makes sense – and this is when you have done something wrong or made a mistake. In other words, apologise when you are sorry and the customer should receive an apology.
When it comes to your value, your product and your price – you need to back yourself. If you get into the habit of apologising for them, then you’ll find yourself sending an underlying message that infers the customer isn’t receiving great value, a great product and a great price. I don’t want to make this a gendered issue because it applies to everyone, though I must say in my personal experience I’ve seen more females pick up the apologising habit.
Confidence and certainty are contagious. Don’t be apologetic for what you do and what you’re providing: Be confident in your value and process.
What do you think?
Make Today the Day
Sonia
This blog post was originally posted on my training website, Statusone.com.au, on Aug 29, 2018. I have since been moving some of my favourite blog posts from there over to here, as this is now my ‘content hub’ and I want you to have access to some of the cool stuff I’ve written about before. You can still check out the Status One site if you’re interested in corporate training if you want. Also, don’t forget to sign up for the newsletter below for updates and weekly exclusive content.